Finished with chemo!

I've been so busy lately with the leak in my house and putting things back together once the contractors were done repairing everything, and painting, etc that I haven't had the time to post my most recent happy news- I'm done with chemo!! Yeah!

Can't believe it will already be 2 weeks ago tomorrow I had my last one. I was yucky sick with this last one too, probably because I didn't rest like before- I was just so motivated to get my house repainted inside and start enjoying a *clean* house again that I pushed through it. I definintely used my anti-nausea meds to keep me going but I fininshed. I figured I could either be sick in bed or sick painting so I chose painting- it's so much more rewarding. Now I can rest and enjoy the fruits of my labor. That may be weird thinking to some of you but that's how I do things- I push hard to get my project or whatever I need to do done then I take time to rest. And now I am.

I had my mom here to help me through it all as well. She came out for my last treatment and doctors appointments and just flew home today. I really enjoyed having her around for the end of all this cancer drama. She has been so supportive of me, as have so many of my other family members and friends. While she was here she took care of so much, helped me clean, spoiled us a little and helped entertain my very active toddler while I painted- thanks mom!!

Another shout out goes to my dear husband Ammon. He has seen me through it all remaining positive that I would make it when I was crying that I wouldn't. He gave me a blessing at the beginning of all of this (before I went to the emergency room where I first heard the word 'cancer') that has given us both assurance that I would make it through. He has been by my side at treatments or at home watching our baby so I could go. He worked hard at his job which provides the precious insurance to cover my very expensive surgeries and treatments. He shaved his head for me and remains bald everyday when I can at least wear a wig or hat. He's not demanding and understands when I feel run down and can't do it all. He loves me- scars, bald head and all- and I love him so much more for it.

So, back to chemo. Well, the good news is I'm done. Y-E-A-H, no more awful chemical taste in my mouth, no more nausea and hopefully my hair will grow back soon. But the all-important question of whether I am cancer-free is still quite ambiguous. My CA-125 is still elevated out of the normal range. That was shocking and very disappointing to hear. My doctor said the real mystery is why my level stopped decreasing; it just plateaued. She was concerned what that could mean so she sent me for a CT scan. What she was looking for was any thickening around my organs meaning the cancer could have spread to them or to any new sites. Luckily, there was nothing to be alarmed over from the scan. Phew!

My doc thinks the elevated CA-125 level could mean inflammation such as from endometriosis, which I was found to have at my last surgery (I didn't know this so she gave me a copy of my operative report to read). In talking to my mom and Ammon later we queried how I could have endometriosis if I don't have a uterus anymore?? The next day when I was seen for my chemo the doc answered my question by stating that endometriosis can be found anywhere in the body. It's been found on fingernails, eyes and other places in the body- weird huh? So, my elevated level is explained by endometriosis- yeah for endometriosis! How many of you that suffer with this condition could actually cheer to have it?...but for me, it's a blessing. It's benign.

The docs will just need to keep monitoring my levels. Maybe since I presented abnormally from the beginning, this slightly elevated level is normal for me (or it truly is just endometriosis). I have another doctors appointment in a month to check me again. If there's still a concern, my doc said she may want to do another laproscopic surgery to take a peak inside to rule out any other cancer concerns.

In the meantime, I am celebrating my end-of-chemo victory!

Chemo today

Thankfully my platelets were high enough for chemo today-- up to 138, well over the 100 minimum I  needed and way above last week's level of 52. My WBC is low but not too low to prevent me from getting chemo. I was stoked but what a long day! 

Amelia was sick yesterday and had drainage from her ear in the evening letting me know her "cold" the doctor told me she had on Friday was an ear infection. Poor thing was sick all weekend and did not sleep well. My wonderful husband took it upon himself to get up with her allowing me to sleep so I could recover and be ready for chemo. Poor guy has been dragging- what a trooper. Oh how I love that guy at times like these. :) 

Because I didn't know if Amelia was contagious and not wanting to make anyone else's kids sick, I decided to wait for Ammon to get home after 4pm yesterday and then get my blood drawn. Because of that delay, my blood results weren't ready bright and early this morning. Once I heard they were good though, I was ecstatic and headed over. I first needed to meet with the doctor (it was time for my every 3 week visit) but with a different doctor. My regular doc just had a baby and is on maternity leave. After my visit, I started chemo but quite late at 11:30am and was set to be there for at least 5 hours. This was much more delayed than expected so I had to spend some time arranging for Amelia to be taken to her doctor's appointment, the last appt available at 3:10 in the afternoon, since I wouldn't be able to make it. I also made arrangements for Connor to ride the bus home and stay at a friend's house after school. I am so grateful that all worked out!

My chemo went fine. I am trying to pay attention to my body to see if I have some of the dreaded side effects that my previous regime of having the drugs every week were meant to eliminate. The side effects I most worry about are numbness in my hands and feet (neuropathy) and debilitating nausea. The neuropathy should hit within the first day...so far so good...but the nausea will be more on the 3rd or 4th day once the anti-nausea drugs wear off. I'm not looking forward to that if it hits me.

I also was given a WBC shot called Neulasta. It's a $5,000 shot that my insurance thankfully completely paid for. It is good for 10 days and will allow my bone marrow to be rebuilt in time for my next chemo. Good and bad with this shot- good is I don't have to give myself daily shots..super YEAH..bad is I definitely have more bone pain because the dose is more concentrated. I guess every option comes with its positives and negatives.

I just am very grateful that I was recovered enough to keep up the schedule so I will finish at the end of this month! With my new schedule, I only have one more treatment!! I can't tell you how excited I am! This has been a long road but looking back, it's gone by pretty fast. I've realized most things in my life are like that. Everything I look forward to, whether good or bad, seem to take forever in anticipation and while I'm living them but once I get near to the end, they seem to have passed more quickly than expected. I just feel blessed to be nearing the end and returning to Health!

Change in chemo

So my platelet counts were too low AGAIN this week. They have to be a minimum of 100 to get chemo and they were 55 last week and 52 this week! I don't know how they went down but somehow it was possible. This was a big bummer and pretty scary to me when I heard but my doctor, via my nurse, reassured me this is very common. Many patients that have every week treatments like I had been receiving usually get to a point where their bodies can't recover quickly enough anymore. I was reassured again that my prognosis doesn't change. That's excellent news!

To manage this ongoing problem, my doc has now decided to change how I receive my chemo. What I had been receiving was Carbo Platinin every 3 weeks and small doses of Taxol every week. My doctor has now changed it to me having Carbo still every 3 weeks but the full dose of Taxol too at that time because my body is now needing so much more time to recover. The only reason the Taxol was spaced out before was to reduce side effects. So...those might increase but at least I'll have the 2 weeks in between treatments to recover. If I'm good to get chemo next week, I'll actually finish early by a week. That also means I have a week to play with if I'm not yet recovered. I kindof like the idea of less treatments so I'm ok with this change. Another plus of this more spread out schedule is I don't have to give myself daily shots of Neupogen for my WBC. I'll only need to take those shots the week I have chemo. That will be less shots (yeah!) and the added benefit of not having to deal with the terrible mail-order pharmacy I am now forced by my insurance to use. Long story short- they have messed up my order so many times (I think we're up to 4 or 5 times now) and I have had to spend a good hour on the phone with them everytime to straighten it out...and then they usually still get something wrong. I tell you, that is not how I wish to spend my "free" time when I'm supposed to be recovering.

So, this new schedule has me hopeful that all will work out well. I feel it's all in the Lord's hands and He has plans for my future. Indeed, I have so much to look forward to and live for :)  I know I wouldn't have nearly as positive progress and outlook without the sustaining power of prayers and supportive loved ones in my life. I can't say enough how much I love and appreciate all of you!!

No chemo this week

Sadly my platelet count was too low this week (half of what it needs to be) to be given chemo. My doctor said there is no shot that can be given to elevate them like I already take for my WBC. She said all I can do is take the week off because my body needs more time to recover. The harm in giving me chemo when it's low is that I could have uncontrolled bleeding (platelets help with blood clotting). And the chemo keeps knocking down those amounts so if my counts get too low, I would need a blood transfusion. Obviously I don't want that so I'm *trying* to take it easy.

I'll get my blood taken again on Monday so hopefully it's all good enough for chemo. So far, missing the 2 weeks I have should not affect my outcome nor extend my treatment. Both weeks were low dose Taxol weeks I missed. I do worry though if my blood isn't good this next week if some change will be needed...

Over half-way!

Cancer update: Yes, I am over half-way through my treatments. Yeah! I'm feeling pretty good...much better than I am on the inside. 

I got to "skip" treatment two weeks ago because my WBC (white blood counts) were too low. It didn't feel like I skipped because I was in the office 4 times that week trying to get booster shots to see if my counts could be brought up enough to have the treatment. No go. But thankfully that was my first "break" so I'm not thrown off my schedule (I am slated to finish the end of February) nor does it affect my overall prognosis. To prevent me skipping a week in the future, my doctor wants me to take a booster shot daily for the rest of treatment (before it was "as needed").That's totally worth it to stay on the schedule.

This week, I was able to have treatment as normal as my counts were just fine, I'm sure in large measure due to the shots. I think the effects of the chemo are beginning to catch up to me though. This was a yuckier-than-normal week for me. I felt generally gross most days. And I've started to develop a nasty taste in my mouth. I'm wondering if it's what a lot of patients experience where they end up using plastic utensils to eat because they get a metal taste in their mouth. I wouldn't describe the taste I'm experiencing as metal but more what my sister helped me to identify as "chemical", like the cumulative effect of the chemo is oozing out of me to the point that I'm "tasting" it. Again, worth whatever the cost to be cured. 

I met with my doctor this week (I do so every 3 weeks- at the beginning of each new round of chemo). I asked her if she thought my treatments were working and if I will be in remission after I'm done. She said "yes" without hesitation. Once I'm in remission, I will come for appointments every 3 months for 2 years. If I have no recurrences at that point, I'm considered cured. I so look forward to that!
 
I am so glad I can function more or less normally and that I'm able to take care of my kids and household. I definitely know I am supported by the many prayers that are being offered on my behalf. Thank you all again for strengthening me. It's working!!

Fall 2011- picture summary

CONFERENCE

We took a family trip again to Utah this time in October for General Conference (it will likely be an annual pilgrimage for us as it coincides with the LDS Chaplain Conference).

Look who I saw on Temple Square between Saturday morning and afternoon sessions-- Elaine S. Dalton, General Young Women President! Doesn't she look great? She was taller than I thought she'd be and she was so interested in those Young Women. Great example.

Very personable.

I love those imposing spires.

Assembly Hall spires.

The gardens are so beautiful around Temple Square...and I love roses so couldn't resist.

I don't know what this is called but it's this antique-looking bell between the Tabernacle and Assembly Hall.

Side of the Tabernacle with the Salt Lake temple spires behind.

Ammon and I in the Conference Center after a session.

I think it's cool how the lights changed behind us from filming in the dark (above), to a blue background to a pink (below) all within a couple minutes taking these pics.

The General Authorities on the stand.

My father-in-law always says the Conference Center looks like the Galactic Senate (from Star Wars). I don't disagree.

In the lobby of the Conference Center.

Cool multi-story sculpture in the lobby.

The skylight that sculpture is attached to letting in lots of natural light.

On Temple Square after a session.

Love God. Love Country.

We took a tour of the Conference Center. This was the rooftop view where you can see the State Capitol in the distance. (I miss my hair...)

Cool family history etching on the roof.

Our tour guide was good...but not a very good photographer. He was supposed to get all of the temple. Oh well. At least he got all of us!

The painting behind me in the Conference Center is one we also gave to Ammon's family a few years back. We didn't know the original was here. We chose it because we loved how the people are helping each other up. That's the point of a family, to help one another during this life.

Yes, that is President Boyd K. Packer of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles! Ammon and I were on the front row to hear him speak the last day of LDS Chaplain Conference. It was amazing.

The kids excited to see daddy and mommy return after being away at conferences.

LARSEN GATHERING

Connor looking very Pan-like wearing daddy's Air Force blues cap.

Millie pulling a toy phone of yesteryear. I remember having one exactly like that when I was a girl.

Grandma holding cousin Brayden next to Amelia. Don't they look like they could be siblings? Big blue eyes both.

Larsens and Weintzs assembled on the stairs Grandpa Merlin Larsen built. (from the top, l to r: Aunt Lori Weintz, Gwendolyn Larsen, Grandma Birdie Larsen, Connor; 2nd row: Ammon, Alex and Tamara Larsen, Charlotte, Hunter & Randy Weintz; 3rd row: Amy Larsen; 4th row: Sarah, Brayden, Jimmy, Amelia & Melanie Larsen and Marnie Weintz.)

Family playing a "speed" pool game.

HALLOWEEN

Doesn't she look like a zombie baby? I left the red eyes on purpose to get the effect ;) For "Larsen Ladies Night Out" (while the guys were at Priesthood Session), we went to Gardener Village. This little shopping area goes all out decorating for Halloween. They have these great witch mannequins everywhere and have a fun Witch Scavenger Hunt that's great for the kids.

Left the red eyes here too...only for Halloween.

Sarah found her match.

Connor found a musical witch playing the piano.

Cozy with sweet Aunt Amy. Amelia's such a great cuddler.

Lovely sister-in-law Tamara with her sons Brayden and Asher.

Sarah and Mils with a bubblegum fairy (I think that's what she called herself).

Crazy expression on Connor's face.

Finished the Witch Scavenger Hunt. Thumbs up dude.

Back at home, this is my mom visiting getting Amelia ready for Trick or Treating. Amelia is cute checking herself out in the mirror.

 She is "the Bride of Frankenstein".

Can you guess our family theme?...Connor is Frankenstein, Amelia the Bride and Ammon is Igor.

I was supposed to be Dr. Frankenstein but I wasn't feeling up to going out so my mom filled in wearing her lab coat.

FUN IN THE YARD

Sweetie loves her quad.

Little blondie by her beloved quad.

Here, have some rocks!

Funny sign Connor made to "warn" people not to cross in front of Amelia's swing when she's swinging.

Swinging with the boy.

Swinging all together.

Swinging with the girl.

Swinging with cousin Aiden.

RACE

Stake BBQ 5K race Ammon ran in having won 3 of the last 4 years. (He's to the left of the organizer lady in the middle with the blue hat and white shirt.)

On the home stretch.

Sprint for the finish.

Talking to the young high school student who beat him by a few seconds. But that's pretty good...Ammon's twice this kid's age!

MEET THE AUTHOR

I enjoy reading and being a part of a book club so for our November meeting, we were able to get the author of "These is my Words", Nancy E. Turner, to come speak to us!! She spoke extensively about the history of her family that led to the idea for this historical fiction series, the book writing process and how she was published. She was a very fascinating person to hear. I took a picture here of my copy of the book on top of the time-period accurate quilt she made that was subsequently used as the cover art for her third book in the trilogy, The Star Garden.

Here she is, Nancy E. Turner, signing my copy of "These is my Words". Now I doubly cherish this beloved novel not only because it's signed by the author but because it was given to me for my birthday (when I was on hospital bedrest for Amelia and Abigail) by Janis Golding who passed away only 2 months later.